Giving Birth is hard. How do I know if I can do it?
Yes! It is true that birth is hard. There is a lot going on physically and emotionally, it’s a tremendous change and shift in your identity and family dynamic. Think about a time in your life in which you experienced something difficult (death in the family, chronic illness, hiking a 14er or backpacking, recovering from an accident, divorce etc). I am sure it was extremely difficult, and hurt a lot. How did you get through this event? Relying on family members or friends for support, physical healing, time, being gentle with yourself, crying? There is no doubt that birthing your baby can be one of the most strenuous and difficult things you’ll ever do. It can also be one of the most empowering and magical.
Here are four ways to help you through.
Hire a doula - doulas are support people who assist birthers through pregnancy, labor, and the postpartum period. They are trained specifically to assist you through this process and are there to provide you physical, emotional, and informational support. They can also teach your partner how to support you more effectively (Although most of the time partners step up to the plate effortlessly). In having a doula present during your birth, you are less likely to need interventions, less likely to need a cesarean section, more likely to have a positive birth experience, and there is also a decrease in labor duration! Doulas also can make sure the birthing team knows your wishes so that you can focus on birthing your babe.
Move THROUGH the fear and sensation- this is one that is essential but can be difficult. There is no doubt about it, once you begin labor, it really can’t end until your baby is born. You can’t stop it. You can’t turn back time. All you can do is move through it. Focus on one contraction at a time. Rest completely in between. Rely on your support people. Trusting your body and the process can greatly influence the flow of labor. Part of moving through, is working with your breath. Long inhales and exhales can provide extra oxygen, can calm the nervous system, and can give you something to focus on.
Vocalize- Yes! You can make as much noise as you want and that feels good to you! This means you can moan with contractions, curse, laugh, cry, speak your needs , speak to your partner or baby. Open that throat and create low guttural sounds to open the pelvis and bring that energy (and baby) down down down.
Trust your intuition- does it feel good to move a certain way? Do you want to ask for a different nurse? Or want your dogs out of the room? Do you feel like you need to be alone? Really listening to your gut and your intuition can help you move through this journey. Sometimes you need a change of scenery or a subtle energy shift- these small changes can make an incredible difference in your body’s response to stress or external factors and the way labor progresses from then on.