A Gentle Postpartum
The initial few months after having a baby is a giant shift from what you are used to! You are busy learning how to care for a tiny human, and perhaps you have other littles running around as well. I am here to tell you that it is ok and encouraged to be gentle & forgiving with yourself. In this blog post, I will be giving some of my greatest tips (from my experience working with new parents, and my training) to set you up for a gentle and healing postpartum period.
#1) Who are your support systems?
Perhaps you can hire a doula- a non judgmental third party who supports new families during this period. They can provide emotional support, help with household flow (think laundry, pet care, errands, keeping the fridge stocked), cooking, some provide body work, and some can provide baby care while you nap, shower, or have alone time with your partner. It’s important to interview several doulas to see who makes the best fit and resonates with you! Worried about the cost? Easy peasy… add services or a fund to your registry! Family and friends LOVE to contribute to mental health.
What family members and friends do you have close by that you can call on for support? I always suggest calling these folks during pregnancy and checking in about their personal load and if they are comfortable with being part of your team. Who can you call in the middle of the night if you need to talk to someone? Who do you feel authentic and comfortable around? Who can you break down in front of and not feel ashamed? Who can you call to bring you groceries, or pads, or carry out last minute?
Do you have a counselor or therapist lined up for you and your partner? Someone you trust to walk this journey with you? These are all things to think about when choosing your “tribe”.
#2) Proper Nutrition
It’s so hard to think about cooking a nutritious meal when you have a million other things going on and caring for a newborn. This is why I suggest making freezer meals ahead of time, setting up a meal train, and hiring a PP doula who cooks or someone else who can provide you fresh foods. This is SO important for healing! One thing to keep in mind is that there isn’t a lot of digestive fire (Agni) after you’ve had a baby, so consuming easily digestible meals is key. Think soups, porridge, oatmeal, everything cooked, nothing raw, and lots of warming spices like cardamom, cinnamon, nutmeg, turmeric, and black pepper. I have some amazing PP recipes in a past blog post of mine.
#3) Rest
Postpartum is a time for rest and bonding. Make nest areas around the house so that you can stay comfortable and supported- lots of pillows for propping yourself up, nursing, and blankets to stay warm. Warmth is essential to bring balance back to the body- fuzzy socks, hats, warm herbal tea, and keeping the house temp a little warmer than you normally do can all help with this. Remember all of those support systems you have in place! They will make sure laundry is done, trash is taken out, and dogs are walked. It’s OKAY to rest and not do much. Remember you are expending a lot of energy feeding your baby and not getting much sleep. For those of us who are planners, like housework, and feel the pull to be “productive” due to our high stress, high movement society, this will take some getting used to- and encouragement from our partners/support team.
#4) Baby love
Your baby is here in your arms, finally! You may miss this little nugget being in your womb, and there are all sorts of emotions that can take place. Remember that your baby only needs their parents, or caregivers. They need to feel your heart beat, and they are soothed by your voices. Newborns cannot regulate their nervous systems, so maintaining peace and calm in your own body is really important- and difficult at times! Kiss their sweet faces and remind yourself that this intimate & vulnerable time passes way too fast. Enjoy the little moments, and make sure you and your partner get time together as well. Snuggles, skin to skin, and nursing can all be ways to connect with baby and show them love. Keeping Oxytocin flowing is really important for hormone balance, elevated mood, increased milk supply, and better sleep. Spend time doing things you love and that fill your cup.